Divorce can trigger anxious, upset feelings that may completely consume your mind. Losing assets and time with your children along with your marriage can suddenly make the day-to-day responsibilities of your job seem impossible.
Here are a few tips for three common questions asked by divorcees struggling to keep up at work.
Is it unprofessional to bring personal issues into the office?
You may not feel comfortable spilling the personal details of your divorce with the entire office, but alerting your supervisor of it is a good way to secure scheduling flexibility for mediation sessions and court dates. Your supervisor may also be more understanding if there is a sudden decline in your productivity.
However, beware of using divorce as a crutch. Using your divorce an excuse for a continually poor performance at work or too many missed days can still result in you losing your job.
How can I focus at work while dealing with divorce?
Everyone experiences divorce differently. Depending on the emotions you are feeling, you may seek different methods of distracting or calming yourself. For example, if you are feeling very angry, a stress ball may help dissipate your rage. However, this mechanism might not be useful for someone who experiences bouts of crying or depression.
No matter what emotions you're feeling, getting healthier will help increase your ability to focus and decrease your stress. Being healthy means sleeping between seven and eight hours each night, exercising regularly and eating well.
You can also try further separating your work and personal life by putting your cell phone in a drawer and resisting social media while you work. Removing photographs of your ex-spouse and taking on more responsibilities within your role can also help gear your attention on work only.
What do I do if I'm not sure I can handle my job and my divorce?
If your work performance is suffering severely, you should seek resources for help. Divorce support groups can be found online, and counseling may even be offered as a part of your employee benefits. You should also seek legal counsel to ensure that you are following correct legal procedures and taking the best course of action in your negotiations.
Changing your finances drastically by quitting your job, changing jobs, turning down a promotion, getting fired or taking out large loans can have a negative impact on your divorce proceedings. These actions will not absolve you of the responsibility to pay spousal or child support. However, they will limit your employability and lower your finances after the divorce.
Getting over a divorce is an extremely difficult situation without the added stresses of work and finances. A lawyer can help take the pressure of legal complexities off your shoulders while you work through this difficult time.